Four Fifty Five A M

Often, the less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it.
- Mark Twain

It's necessary that I read a lot so that I can write frequently and well. It's been almost a year since I have read any fiction or non-fiction book though there is no problem in accessing any of these. When I get time I sit with my laptop and sleep. Otherwise I am in the university attending some classes, at work or enjoying with my room-mate friends. It's been so much time but I am still not able to meet people here I want to visit. Timings simply don't match, I don't get enough of reasons and I prefer being more conservative.

My friends here at the university complain I don't return their calls, don't meet regularly or hardly spend any time with them. I know they understand why it's all this way. They are, I am sure, happy that there is at least somebody they know who works. With things getting tough here, internships drying up and living expenses increasing, it's a blessing to be me. But I am greedy. I don't know what makes me this. I refuse to wait for things to come to me. Many people tell there is a time for everything. I refuse to accept that. Marking for timings and placing events in them has been done by man; Allah didn't ask us to do that. There are orders from Allah and these paradigms dictated my men are against what Allah has asked for. It's a pity how decisions that mean lifetime to people are made based on money and financial status. Allah decides who gets happiness and it's source. Money doesn't decide. Money is very important though.

I came here for money. When I listen to people who say all they need is a decent enough job, a simple average life with just enough money for necessities and simple luxuries, a small family in a cozy home and a peaceful life creates a dislike for them within me. There are many questions I can ask them but I know it makes no difference. Perhaps such people are important too - if everybody started asking for more than average then it would make it difficult for people like me. I understand the intense competition. I never forget what Allah wants from me. This reminds me of a quote from a movie: "I want what all men want, I just want it more". Alhamdulillah.