Wednesday, October 8, 2008

The Best Things In Life Aren't Things

If you're good at something, never do it for free.

- The Joker, The Dark Knight

The moment I raised my head standing at the podium I could see all Americans, Europeans, Chinese and Indians keen on what I was going to do next. I will remember this presentation I gave today for a long time. I worried how I would sound, I was worried if I would get confused with the mock-up I was going to present and I was of course worried that I would let my team-mates down who had just finished their part. Our team had already taken extra minutes more than what was stipulated for us. The professor sitting in the last row was now ready to have a look at how our web application would appear.

Alhamdulillah ours was the only team praised by the professor. It was a compliment. I got a pat from one of my team-mates. The other one appreciated me as well. I felt I got recognition and respect in the class. It was still a very small thing but ended up making a lot of difference to me. Back in India I had given presentations in front of lecturers and students I could tell anything in front of. I knew nobody here. Four of my team-mates are Americans and two are Indians. They all make me feel comfortable. All of them have their jobs and two of them are married. I am the only fresher - Fresh of the Boat! So, any appreciation I get from them makes a lot of difference to me.


I had been to Six Flags in Arlington with my cousin sister and her family last Sunday. It was perhaps one of my happiest days here. I didn't enjoy any rides - my purpose was only to be with my sister. And they dropped me back to my apartment in the evening. They had come here from Austin and left later in the night. Saturday I spent the day with my aunt and cousins who came here from Houston and with some of my second cousins. I met most of them only here in Dallas and Houston for the first time but still got comfortable with them easily. I find this a change in me - I was very shy. I am shy even now but just because I meet people who show care and concern toward me, I cannot stop myself from giving all my heart to them and get friendly.


Last weekend showed to me how much difference it makes to have people around us whom we can love and who love us. Even if there is only one person with us who could always be loved and who would love in return, it gives immense peace and happiness. Allah has designed us this way. SubhanAllah. The moment I returned to my apartment at 1:30 am early Saturday I knew I was in a completely different world here - just those same walls and the same three rooms. I like this place but I don't like staying with nobody to love. I know thousands of students like me have the same life and they are used to it. I don't want to get used to it. I am the new generation; I believe in change.


I get to stay in continuous contact with my parents, brother and a few friends. It feels so nice to receive messages and e-mails from each of them. It feels great when somebody calls. The toughest part here is sleep. Maybe I can someday write in detail why sleep troubles me. Otherwise alhamdulillah things are moving smoothly. I will be happy as long as I am sure this phase of my life will end soon and I can catch up with a better future. I thank Allah for every bit of knowledge and wisdom I receive. There is so much to share but nobody to take it from me.

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