To go beyond is as wrong as to fall short.-Confucius, Analects
It's 5:17 am, an hour has passed after I reached this place I call home and I have to go to work in the afternoon again. I was supposed to take a day off on Tuesday for this week but I was asked to swap it for another day. It was a mood-spoiler. I prefer staying close to the schedule but we have hardy done that in last two months. I even wonder if there is somebody who realizes it. Alhamdulillah I have never caused to make any difference to any schedules. I have so much to talk about but no heart to listen. This April seems so odd. This might be the right way to play it but not the way to win it.
It's taking me like a forever to write a post at this time of the day and I am disappointed for the reason I had to put 'blogger' in the address bar finally. I wish I had exciting things to write about or rather the excitement to write about them. Moments are so context based that it would take me several paragraphs to get to explain what I am talking about. Not that I have anybody to explain to, anybody to justify to, it's just me I need to let know of what's going down.
I have been thinking of printing all posts of this blog. When I shared this idea with a friend he felt I would be wasting money and time on it. It didn't disappoint me, it just made me sure that few things matter only to me even if they are worth nothing in the supposedly real world. It's easily going to take 600 pages; I can recollect how I would write every day and never missed to record every detail of what effected. I remember hardy of anything of that though. I just sit here today as a resultant product of all that and of course lots more.
I have two books on Java spread a little away from me on my left side. On one of those books there is a brown packet that has all lease's papers. I renewed them for my apartment for another six months. Then there is an automobile classifieds paper right behind the screen of my laptop; I have been going through things like these for over a month now; I found no time yet to show the result of that search. On my right is a leather jacket I bought a few days after getting back from India. I don't know what prompted me to get that; I bought it from Dillards and didn't want it to be from China. It is though.
I have been trying to study Java for long. It's almost like a necessity now. I want to stay in this country for long. After writing these few lines, I now feel, I can go on for any number of pages. But I stop with this one. It's good to hold back at the right times, always a good idea to think before talking and an awesome thing to keep patience. There is a bunch of people now I have to call, respond with some work or at least talk to say a 'hello'. It sounds like a burden at times but it's a commitment of my word. I was planning to visit India in July but decided not to because though it's a good idea, it's not something I should think about. It's so awesome to see children smile.
2 comments:
I am sure it's not that you don't have people to explain it to, but maybe you don't want to.. You write Zubair, and remember that there are many people all over the world, who in spite of their very busy schedules take some time out to read your posts and get into the emotions and understand the feelings..
I was assuming that you'd have already mastered Java by now!! C'mon Zubair!!
I don't have people I can explain to. There is no point. Most of the points are over.
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