Every human being at the bottom of his existence is the same in all features - from the basic structure of the DNA, sophisticated emotions, to the highly disguised human instincts which are more or less on the visible nature similar to those of animals but domesticated by civilization and the faith in God. Human nature is very fundamental with its roots resembling that of animals but as the complexity grows - layer upon layer - man's basic structure turns into civilization.
In broader terms, animals live to further their species - to keep their kind alive. Their instincts for survival make them hunt or search for food and defend themselves from adversities in the best way possible for them using their abilities provided to them by God. They can do anything to protect themselves from threats - anything possible for their kind. To further their species animals regenerate or reproduce in some form and sometimes in a form unique to their species. It's their necessity to have that nature else they would be wiped out. Their instincts help them survive.
A human being is a lot similar to his fellow creatures of the planet. But as God said that he is His best creation, civilization, culture and emotions among other things differentiated him from the wildness of the lower creatures. Man has layers of domestication built upon his basic instincts of survival; each layer creating his individuality and the top most layers showing his individuality. The sophistication and complexity of every layer defines his abilities to hide his basics and gives gradual domestication to his 'wild' instincts. Ultimately he becomes human; a social being.
A man's programming starts even before his birth depending on the movements inside the womb, the voices heard, the quality and type of nourishment given, the genes of parents and their emotional and psychological characters. In short, a man starts getting domesticated even before his lungs start functioning in the open air. He is reared and nurtured in the society that tells him right and wrong and makes him believe what the society believes in. He is socialized. He is brainwashed. And when he learns about God, he learns faith and accepts God's word as the way of life.
But no matter how much he gets surrounded by culture, he keeps his basics inside him - sometimes controlled, sometimes neglected, sometimes unseen and sometimes set loose. From time to time as he grows he learns about his urges - some which he understands by himself, and some the society makes him understand and he decides to take them for granted. He learns that he can fulfill some urges and ignore others. His faith in God helps him with what is right. He grows developing layers on his basics - making himself more complex and more sophisticated. He gathers knowledge and learns wisdom.
At various points in his life he is shown the right and legal ways to fulfill some of those urges which were otherwise found to be unacceptable. He comes to an age from where he can stay alone, earn his own living, and drive his own car if taking an 'ultra-modern' example explains it better. He comes to an age from where he can guide his own life, take his own decisions and work out his future. Thinking of future for a human can perhaps be a highly sophisticated idea which animals might never exhibit apart from their need to reproduce.
This civilized man becomes wise, mature and intelligent. Intelligence can be found in animals but maturity and wisdom are exclusive to human beings. He learns to teach; he learns how to learn. The growing layers make him more complex and more human-like. He still keeps the basics within him. He finds newer and ‘safer’ ways to fulfill them. For instance dancing can be taken as a man's desire to loose control over his body. He likes being free of discipline and mannerisms and he likes dancing. It is found in many communities perfectly acceptable to dance. It is an instinct being exploited - all under the name of civilization.
Instincts are exploited 'soberly' by the ways of calling them trends and fashions, by creating competition in wearing clothes, by calling the show of skin as aesthetics and even by legalizing what could be the most critical of instincts. This has become a part of the civilization. The man in general has been made to believe this as acceptable.
A man can never work against his nature. Neither can a woman of course. Men and women have always been partners. Men, for women are the most important and interesting objects and women, for men are the most important and interesting objects. This character trait is not by choice, ethics or culture. It is inevitable and necessary for the survival of our species. The idea can be presented in a mature way pulling it under the blankets of culture and religion, but instincts remain the same. They are controlled and domesticated.
Working on the upper layers of our behavior, a man or a woman for that matter can never be understood under absolute terms. Take for example the mannerisms - our behavior while being with our parents and siblings is more natural than the one we present in front of outsiders or acquaintances which is more of a manipulation. It is acceptable. It is civilization and not cheating of any sort. But there are of course men who pretend to be gentlemen but are not. I find behaving as a gentleman with an intention to become one is alright, but behaving so to deceive others or hide some character traits is a violation of ethical values a man can keep. This is as intimidating as it can get - with the sophistication of the layers.
A man exhibits his instincts in softer and 'acceptable' ways. The thrill experienced with courtship, the excitement in flirting, the enjoyment in dancing as discussed above, the indulgence in smoking and drinking, the adventure in bungee-jumping, in talking about what love-turned-inside-out is are all examples of the softer ways. But the result is the same - satisfying of primitive urges. Reading novels on romance, enjoying raunchy jokes, sometimes men talking about women and women talking about men, discussing how fascinating violence can be, appreciating near-naked wrestlers, watching beauty contests, and every act that is termed civilized but appears inside the ‘filtered’ or ‘screened’ content is again an example how society decides how the basic human instincts can be fulfilled without being objected.
Lobbying in the corporate worlds, politics, using emotions to befriend people, researching on what humans like so that businesses can be flourished and money be made, studying human psychology to manipulate men, teaching youngsters how to woo the opposite sex and using preferences and tastes to dictate laws can all come under scrutiny if we question the widely accepted ideals of the society. These might be refutable but are seldom criticized as they have become an important part of our being. Calling ourselves modern, we have learnt to fulfill our desires alongside remaining respectable.
All this might be exactly what humans are. The sophistication might grow into the unimaginable and we will continue to find more decent ways to exhilarate the animal within us and satisfy it. We might become more sensible in our outlooks and more charming in our etiquettes. We might have our individual personalities, preferences and tastes, likes and styles. But deep within in some way or the other we would just be living our instincts.
I started thinking about all this considering the behaviors of some of my friends and even me. I am not writing anything to play down on anybody. It's all just to share how I am perceiving it. I really don't know how much I hide about myself from my friends. Some time or the other I have shared every big thing with every person who is a good friend of mine. But I understand not all do this and I accept such behaviors. I don't mean I like my own friends doing such things with me - it definitely hurts when I come to know that something was hidden from me because some instincts like ego and pride were playing big. It gives me a lot of pain whenever somebody uses me to exhibit his instincts - even unintentionally.
Some people can do anything to become successful - success defined here only for them in the way they like it. They are very intelligent but deep down they are very much human. They hide with no reasons of hiding. They have in them something I fail to understand. I wonder how they can remain happy without having very close companionship of friends because we get such friends when we share things which are too intimidate at times. I am not defining friendship. I am just reminding myself of how I can be. I am analyzing the fact that I might be going in the wrong direction. I have never been questioned on my friendship. Rarely do people tell me that I must change something in me. But I remember once a friend telling me that I had changed. Now I know that change was good.
All this can be a big discussion. I have posted a large part of today's post of Flowing Emotions. I think even that blog deserves something and I wanted today's words to be well-read. When I started preparing for CAT long back I thought that there would be some people with me who could help me with some topics. I know I am terribly bad at some sections and I need a lot of help. I was thinking that I would have at least somebody with me to help me. One by one so many of my friends stopped preparing for CAT. And I am left alone with very little motivation. I am not blaming anybody. It all depends on me. I just feel sad that there are intelligent people who can help me but I don't know whom to ask for.
I might not be going to college tomorrow (Friday). I will stay home and try to study. I hope I find some peace in that. I have reduced the size of my present goal calling it more realistic. I might be cheating myself but I am a lazy bug who knows how to find short-cuts. The success will me delayed but won't be made unattainable. InshAllah.
