Optimism means expecting the best, but confidence means knowing how you will handle the worst. Never make a move if you are merely optimistic.A couple of days back I saw the news telling about some officer at HP's office being prosecuted for rape and murder of a female employee committed in his office. The charges on him say that he is responsible for the crime even when he has not committed it just because it was inside his office and he is in charge of that place. Even the Supreme court of India is supporting those claims. I agree to what their idea is. And I hope they will apply the same logic on a bigger scale. The watchman of that office must also be taken into account, the police inspector of that locality too should not be left, the Chief Minister of that state should also be held responsible, and the Prime Minister of the country too. When a CEO is responsible for a crime committed in his company, the Prime Minister of India is responsible for all the crime committed in his country. And of course, this also gives a clear signal to these MNCs that they will have problems in India if they hire female employees. And they talk of gender equality!
I looked at our newly fixed curtains and felt something missing. They are maroon in color, with golden and shiny flower like designs on them, properly drawn into the rods and hung on the brown metal holders. The cloth is of very good quality bought from a famous shop in the city. But even then, there looked a very big thing missing making the drapery incomplete. I was also hoping to see this new attraction as grand. But it didn't appear so. Pelmets are missing.
At least five days in a week I get to spend around 30 minutes in front of the television while having dinner with my parents. There is usually one of two specific programs we watch. The first is on Peace TV - talks by Dr. Zakir Naik, Dr. Israr Ahmed or Ahmed Deedat. Sometimes it so happens that a particular talk is repeated on the channel and my father tunes into Star One. I have no track of what time it usually is when this show is aired but it has turned out to be the best comedy series in Hindi I have seen. 'Sarabhai Vs Sarabhai' is too famous to be given an introduction. Apart from some news that flies into the living room from the television in drawing room, this show is the only entertainment I see on television. Of course there are no replacements to the talks by the three great men I have mentioned.
Now it can sound ironic that I write about a religious and an unIslamic show in the same paragraph. I find no reason to feel ashamed. Those are the only things I watch on the television and I am glad I never get carried away by any other idiotic shows. Rarely do I hear the noises of those soaps that have already corrupted millions of minds over the world. And still, if there is anybody disliking the mentioning of the two things in the same paragraph, I would request them to delete all the music and videos of entertainment from their computers' hard-drives for I am sure they must also be having Islamic content on the same disks, on the same platters and who knows, on the same blocks of data on the drive.
Yesterday evening when I was at my grandmother's house I heard my cousins and my brother playing with pillows hitting each other. They were shouting and jumping on the bed. My mother scolded my brother and made him sit with her. I scolded him too for making a fuss there. Sometime later I went to the other room and started that game again. There were six cushions pulled out from the sofa set and we were throwing them in every way possible on our faces. My targets were my brother and a five year cousin. We shouted, yelled, screamed and continued it till my father arrived. I could have kept the game going, but my cousins left the room.
In my prayers there are times when I feel that the words aren't coming from my heart. I see this happening when I miss a few prayers in succession. I do feel guilty and also find it a bit difficult to get back into the rhythm again. It takes time. And there are also times when even while being completely dedicated to my prayers, I find it difficult to give everything to some of the the duas I make. I see that I don't seem to mean what I am asking from Allah. It's then that I ask Him to make me mean these duas. I pray that the requests I am making are truly from my heart because I know that I am supposed to ask for those things. It is just like knowing what is right and asking Allah to make me do it.
Over these years I have come across people who don't always carry their words with them. I have also seen myself who could not always do it. It irritates me. These people irritate me. It's all about having clear priorities, putting them on paper, correcting them time to time and sticking to them always. I don't write things on paper; I write them on my computer. I try to find the difference between important and urgent. I try to weigh the options, also consider if letting a problem occur can be acceptable, see if the solution costs more than the loss the problem can cause, try to imagine what my elders would have done in that event, recollect if there are any experiences I have had or seen others having, and that is when I go ahead with taking action. But when somebody speaks without thinking all this, without trying to find out why I do so and so things, it makes me the most angry who cannot be tackled.
I don't blindly accept what others tell. I am learning to say a 'no' without showing the slightest signs of discourtesy. I cannot bear to stand with those who agree with what all they are told. I am seeing many such people around these days. They listen to their friends, elders or just about anybody and take it as an ultimatum. Why can't they think? Why can't they use their so many years of education? Why can't they put their intellect behind their actions? I consider every human being equally intelligent. Some just don't understand that. They underestimate themselves. I have done it several times on myself. I feel guilty every time I do it.
I find the last few minutes of my day as the most analytical when I start preparing to go to bed. This is when I analyze the day I have spent. I run through all the words I have spoken and heard. I do forget a lot but I also remember many things. I learn. I sulk. But when I wake up to the next sun, I know I am better than what I was yesterday. And when I step out of my house, I keep in mind that there are people out there more intelligent than me, who have seen more life than me and I need to meet them, learn from them and also thank them if possible. I know I am weak and only Allah can strengthen me.
We all every time strongly believe that we are right in what we say and do. It's perfectly fine that way. But what is necessary is that we understand that we can be wrong. The small amount of wisdom which we use will help us be right at least the next time we speak. We make mistakes, the pathos is when we continue it. It's worst when we don't realize it. We are guided by our desire to seek importance and attention. Even that is perfectly fine. But it should be done in more pure ways. Not by just talking. Messages are better conveyed in silence, smiles and tears. More than 80% of effective communication is through body language. But of course, when with friends, it's better to let all that intense so called wisdom go.
And we are so often influenced by our moods. We also have the famous bad moods, lows and highs and frustrations. I used to write them in words and pretend to relieve myself. I know of many who do it. It supposedly should be considered as wise and mature but I know that as long as we have our priorities right and goals fixed, nothing on earth can perturb us so easily. I wonder how many really understand it when they are happy, sad, frustrated, angry or sullen.